Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Some deeply dull CDs, owned by me, a chump.

Porcupine Tree – Signify
An English prog band – from the nineties. Fuck. I’m so stupid for this utterly toothless sub-Marillion piece of shit.

Robert Fripp – Exposure
Holy Christ. This hurts my feelings and makes me a bad person, all at the same time. I should take my eyes out with a staple remover for owning this.

Various Artists -- What Is Hip?: Remix Project, Vol. 1
I cannot blame myself totally here. I got this for free. It’s shitty DJ remixes of 70s AM radio. They (DJs as a class of humans) manage to make the eponymous song sound like a dirge. Assholes.

Leon Russell – Retrospective
Leon Russell is one of those 70s country rock people that we are supposed to love. ZZ Top is easy to love. This CD is not.

Mission of Burma – VS
Maybe I’m missing the point with this one. It barely catches my attention…I just drift and can’t…hey look! A hummingbird!

Radio Birdman -- The Essential Radio Birdman (1974-1978)
Whoa...WHOA….WHOA! It that a motherfucking SAXOPHONE? Is this Roxy Music? No. It is not. Fucking boring. And I LIKE Australians.

Eno, Moebius, Roedelius -- After the Heat
Eno twiddles knob while two Krautrock douchebag softly queef into some very expensive mics. And I suffer like the dick I am.

Elvis Costello and the Brodsky Quartet – The Juliet Letters
Fuck OFF with this BULLSHIT. My god. It’s like CATS.

Aerogramme -- Sleep & Release
Huh? Who? What? I woke up with this piece of shit in my CD player one day. I then went back to sleep. The Chinese have a term for this sort of thing: Pee Yuu.

Death Ambient -- Death Ambient
Fred Frith! Oh, fuck OFF. God, I am such a CHUMP. This was from an embarrassing John Zorn phase. Please hate me. I deserve it.

Any CD I own that Bill Laswell has touched in anyway, besides Praxis.
The cat sucks the life out of anything he touches. Boring DICK! And I’m a dick for playing along. Sorry I let everyone down. Again.

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6 Comments:

Blogger @DJNoRequest said...

wow -those are some duds there man. good to see a fellow ad-slave voicing his thoughts on moxie - was waiting for the sanborn sax bit....

gots 2 chilluns o my own..
bravo brotha

GD

7:30 PM  
Blogger Hicksion said...

I don't know whether to feel proud that not one of those musical recordings are familiar to me.. um, yeah, I'm going to be proud.

I remember waking up one day finding a Sheryl Crow album on a shelf in my room and genuinely feeling queasy at the thought that I'd bought it in some fit of peak.. it eased when my then girlfriend walked in and upon spotting the CD picked it up saying, ' Oh, thats where I left it..'
Then I realised while I was not a buyer of Sheryl Crows music.. I was sleeping with a listener of Sheryl Crows music.

Our relationship went swiftly downhill after that.

http://cbnc.blogspot.com/

7:01 AM  
Blogger Greg Mills said...

Hickison, you prick:

My wife, who is normal looking, knows the lyrics to War Pigs. This is why I married her.

You should find a nice girl.

Spanish:

From where do you excrete marketing pablum?
I rape the culture in San Francisco at McCann Erickson.

10:27 AM  
Blogger Crackpot Press said...

Even I hate the Brodsky Quartet album....

But I love my secret word

bzowira

12:07 PM  
Blogger Geoffrey Milder said...

Fuck--after your post I took a look through my CDs....people that say they've lived their life without regret are full of shit. Either that or they don't own a single album by the Eagles. I never bought this album (Greatest Hits), I fucking hate the Eagles, but somehow this piece-of-shit-not-good-enough-to-be-the-fucking -coaster-under-my-dog's-ashtray CD found its way into my collection, and has therefor sullied my reputation.

Another disk that reminds me of why I got shoved into lockers in grade school was the soundtrack to Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III--why a remix of Baltimora's "Tarzan Boy" seemed like justification to purchase this piece of shit is really only understood within the confines of a cumulus cloud of pot smoke, even then it's unjustifiable.

I can't even in good conscience use these things as frisbees.

1:59 PM  
Blogger Greg Mills said...

I have managed to hold on to a CD single of Reel Big Fish doing a shitty ska cover of "Take on me".

What am I, the fucking Library of Congress?

Yet I can't throw a goddamn cd away.

Ginger??? Frank Palermo Big Band Plays Zappa? Bird Songs of the Mezoic?

ERASURE!?!?!

Dude, WHAT THE FUCK!

2:26 PM  

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